If the current crop of candidates running for GOP nomination doesn’t get their act together, they are going to doom us all to another 4 years of Barack Hussein Obama.
Normally, it might be very entertaining process to let these gentlemen act out today’s equivalent of Idiocracy’s favorite television show, “Ow, My Balls!”, but I’m not a fan of suicidal economic and energy policies, flavored with identity politics and an unhealthy dose of envy. And the sad thing about the candidates’ current fumbling is that even this crowd, yes even the dreaded Luap Nor has a very real shot at unseating the Naked Emperor, who is trying his hardest to get people thinking about anything but his startling incompetence and unwavering dedication to himself and his twisted vision for this country.
Anyone who has studied history understands that you have to have an ego to want the job of President. And that’s ok. Confidence is good. Narcissism is not. Again, this might normally be a problem, but since this administration has been faithfully served by a fawning press that shouts down any serious criticism with shouts of “RACISM!”, no extravagance is too excessive for King Barack and Queen Michelle. This, like so many flaws, provided the GOP candidates with an opportunity, but it is one that they have sadly squandered in favor of the motes in their own eyes.
The first, and greatest opportunity that this presidential election has provided the GOP field is the opportunity to offer a stark and clear alternative to the reigning Democratic philosophy that, if carried to its logical conclusion, can only make us either vassals or wards of a bankrupt state. As conservatives, we know where the path we are on will take us. We can point to evidence of this now in the results of government “compassion”. We are smart enough to illustrate that the “poor” are the biggest victims of the government’s help without making them the villans. And yet, what are we doing? Standing by, watching people who have let their own egos blind them to this simple, powerful truth, as they prove themselves unworthy, or more ambitious than focused on what really matters. What do I mean? I’m glad you asked.
I don’t like Mitt Romney. I’ve watched him on the television, I’ve heard him on the radio, and I’ve looked at his record. The result is that I have both a personal dislike, and a visceral distrust of him. And that’s bad, because I want to like the guy. I really do. But he is someone who has been running for the job for a decade now, and he, and his supporters are playing from the tried and true GOP method of failure, “Its his turn.” It is the method that got us the grumpy old guy the last time, and Bob Dole before that. Running for years isn’t the kind of experience that I want our candidate to have, and his record as governor isn’t exactly a ringing endorsement. Entitlement isn’t becoming, but it is especially unbecoming for a party that wants to appeal to those who have identified it as a bug and not a feature of our current predicament.
While I understand and appreciate that states, and not the federal government are the places where things like Romneycare should be tried, but at the same time, being a leader is more than “giving people what they want.” Anyone can be a rubber stamp, but offering alternatives to something that clearly goes in the wrong direction, and convincing people that the alternatives are better, or barring that, clearly saying “NO.” to the wrong direction is the mark of leadership. But then, it also requires the courage and acceptance of the fact that you might not be re-elected. I really don’t know why he is doing it, and I can’t figure out what, other than an understanding of economics that the current President lacks, that he thinks he truly offers as an alternative.
Newt Gingrich. If I had to sum it up, I’d say “A smart guy (no, really, not like the “smart like Spock” Obama) who says and does dumb things. Gingrich is another candidate who I want to like. I can see him speaking at a debate or talk show, or hear him on the radio, and be nodding in agreement, right up until I can’t, because he’s made a wild leap, clean off the reservation, and off into the next county. Whether it is the favorable self-comparisons to Wilson, T.R., or FDR, or more than coincidental revelations that his default answer to every perceived problem is “government”, he doesn’t fail to disappoint. When he started in on his ridiculous attacks on Romney for his work at Bain Capital, and for (gasp!) firing people, while making money, it eliminated any doubt that Newt is all about Newt (for anyone who slept through his previous self-coronation as the nominee weeks before Iowa). Add it to his other moments of dumb (cozying on the couch with San Fran Nan, and his years of gushing about man-made global warming), and I don’t care about the divorces. He’s already shown me where his heart and his mind are, and he still seemed to think that he could fool me into believing that he represented the alternative we need to present to the country at large.
Ron Paul. While I think he has some decent economic ideas, he’s clearly failed to grok a simple but fundamental lesson: Isolationism kills. And he is so eager to go down that road that he thinks that the single most destructive tool ever built by man is simply an expression of sovereignty for one of the most unhinged and belligerent powers in the world today. That said, I think he is actually honest about why he’s in the race. However, his followers have an excessively fanatical dedication to him in more than enough supply to make up for the excessive love of self he seems to lack. And anyone who has ever been told “You just don’t understand. Ron Paul is the only one who can save this country!!!!11!!!!” knows it.
John Huntsman. What makes a man accept an appointment as ambassador from a President who is hostile to every conservative principle that we can state? What makes that same President offer it in the first place. Seriously, the talk isn’t impressive, and the walk isn’t there at all. Throw in some odd advertisements that say some odd things about the candidate, and the best thing I can say is that his daughters will be invited to all the best parties thrown by the Republican Party Reptiles at the convention, but he stands no chance of mounting a serious challenge to his former boss…and I think he knows it. You can tell me I’m wrong in 4 to 8 years, but this is about him making it his turn in the next election, or the one after that. Been there, done that, not interested.
Rick Perry. I love his platform. I sincerely believe that he is serious about making government smaller, not larger. He also inherited an economy from George W. Bush, but since he had no incompetence to distract us from, he doesn’t complain. He just grows jobs. Did he mess up with Guardasil? Yep. Does he know it? Yep. However, I think that he also had an expectation that this just belonged to him. If that wasn’t the case, then he ran a phenomenally bad campaign when he got into it. That said, he’s done so poorly up to now, I think that he’s probably done.
Rick Santorum. I admit that I like Rick. Yes, it is because I am also a social conservative, which means that I also am not likely to believe the sillier stories that people are likely to tell about him. I believe that he also understands the threats to our country, and not just our culture. But some of his negative attacks have smacked of desperation. I think that his message can resonate. I think that Iowa proved that. Romney certainly didn’t expect what happened. Newt had no idea it was going to happen. But I think that the temptation to believe that HE had to do this drove some of those attacks. And that strikes me as silly, because the only person in this race who should be desperate is Barack Hussein Obama, because he can’t run on his record. That leaves him with the race card, class warfare, and trying to smear whoever he faces in the general election.
In closing,
Mitt: I don’t trust you. And I’m not the only one. If you can’t close the deal after this many years, you aren’t going to. If you gave a damn about the future of this country, you’d thank your supporters, and step back out of the limelight.
Newt: I would love for you to debate the President. I think that would show the world that on the subject of intellect, he’s all hat and no cattle. I don’t care about your divorces. I’m not looking for someone to date; I’m looking for someone who can cogently identify the things that are broken in Washington D.C., speak clearly and honestly about them, present a plan that is simple enough for Democrats to understand, and execute it. And you come so close, only to lose it on the starting premise. Government does not and should not be the starting point in proposing solutions. The worst of it is, I think that you mean well, and that is simply your previous government service conditioning you, which is probably why you thought it appropriate and intelligent to criticize the other unacceptable candidate for his private sector experience.
Ron Paul: Retire already. Texas is a big state, big enough to contain your brand of insanity, and not be overly burdened by having to admit when asked that you are from there. Besides, your supporters are more annoying and condescending than even the Obamafaithful, and as this season progresses, they flirt with the prospect of injury by continuing to try to tell me how I just don’t understand about you.
Rick Perry: I love you man, and in a very non-homo way. But being right doesn’t mean that you can take the votes for granted. You have to want it, and you have to work for it. You didn’t bring your “A” game, and that is why you’re on track to not be the President next year, which is too bad, because I would have loved to hear the whining from the gun fearing wussies of the self-appointed cognoscenti about you being armed, and them not having the courage to call you “stupid” like they did through 8 years of George W. Bush.
Rick Santorum: You don’t quit, and I admire that. You have yet to disappoint me by saying something excessively stupid, and therefore I think that you must understand what further success in the primaries will mean for you. I’m sure that Dan Savage’s attack is just a taste of what kind of character attacks you can expect for trying to have some character and expect the same for us moving forward. It won’t be easy, and if the media even suspects that you have a serious shot at the nomination, Colmes’ and Robinson’s remarks will seem like the bleeding edge of a very, very large spear tip. Keep on the message, please.
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